After spending the month of August with Pat Parelli, on my last day I had the opportunity to ask him “What is one tip you would give me for my horsemanship?” His answer was thoughtful yet simple “Raise your expectations”.
That simple phrase seems to have become my theme since then, both in my own horsemanship and in helping others raise their expectations. I have come to realize that my horses don’t give much because I don’t expect much of them, consequently I don’t ask for much. It becomes a vicious cycle that slowly grinds us to a halt.
At a few points during the summer Pat pushed me and my horse pretty hard and I never really questioned why he did it. But he explained to me that day that he pushed us hard so I could see what my horse was capable of. It was at that point the lesson became clear. He never pushed beyond what either one of us were capable but he did push us out of the usual. He had an expectation for both of us and we tried to live up to it.
To me an expectation is simply the picture we have in our mind of how something should or will be. As I have explained to many of my students we need to have expectations that are appropriate for ourselves and our horses. Much like we have expectations of a first grader and the skills that are appropriate for their grade level. However, as they grow and learn our expectations change. The expectations we have for a first grader are going to be different than a fifth grader and still different than a freshman in high school and so on. The same is true with our horses, we need to have realistic and appropriate expectations.
Sometimes in our endeavor to create a good relationship with our horse and not be too “direct line” we lower our expectations for ourselves and our horses. And on the other hand we can see in certain segments of the competitive world unrealistic expectations for horses, such as performing a sport before they have a foundation which can lead to disappointment, frustration, undue stress and finally force. But not having clear and appropriate expectations can be harmful in not living up to your full potential. We vacillate between two worlds, unrealistic expectations of our horses and no expectations. What we fail to see is the middle ground of appropriateness.
I challenge you to raise your expectations and ask for more and you may be surprised at how much your horse will give. As you raise your expectations of your horse, I want to challenge you again as students to “raise your expectations of yourself” and what you can accomplish in your own horsemanship.
I recall in graduate school studying the speeches of great men and women. I was attracted to Winston Churchill and several of his speeches. I don’t recall all the details of where and when but I do recall the entire speech. He was giving a commencement address at a small college.
He slowly rose from his seat walked up to the podium, looked the audience in the eye and spoke three words with resolution and conviction. “Never give up!” and returned to his seat. The audience was at first taken aback but after a few moments to realize the power of those words they rose to their feet and gave him a standing ovation.
I have such a vivid picture of the speech that it haunts me to this day. That image I recall monthly if not weekly in the course of my life because I would be the one he was talking to because I tend to quit before I get started.
In our journey with our horses as with our journey through life, we have choices. The biggest choice is to quit or move on. Some of us never quit on things that we should have abandoned long ago but most of us give up far too easily on the things that matter most to us.
What is it that you want from your horsemanship journey? Have you already quit and now you are settling for something less than what you really want? Take heart from a great statesman and “Never give up”.
I found this video on youtube that has the same message but presented in a different way.
Please leave your comments. I now have an additional image to recall when I get knocked down. Get Back Up and Never Give Up!
While at the Parelli ranch in August participating in the Master Instructor Program one of the things that Pat talked about on several occasions was to watch the Masters and get to know what is world class. He also recommended we look on the internet for videos of World Class performances so that we could get it into our minds what is a top quality performance.
This video was sent to me by Ale G, a very accomplished dressage rider herself. It’s of Edward Gal and Moorlands Totilas’ and their performance at the World Dressage Masters series in Hickstead, 2009. As we were watching this together later she commented ” If they perform like that at the Olympics they will take GOLD”.
Here is the winning event that broke the world record with a score of 89.40%.
“Don’t saddle the the young horses in the barn because someone saddled Presence in here and she started bucking and about jumped through the plate glass window into the office” was one of the first comments I heard about Presence even before I knew her name. Little did I know that she would end up being mine.
The second time I heard her mentioned was when Pat asked if there were any problems with the horses that he needed to know about. One of the externs spoke up and said that Presence bucked every time you saddled her. The reason I remembered her name this time was because just minutes earlier I had looked on the board and realized she had been assigned to me for the week.
After the meeting I went out to do my assigned chores and when I came back to start my horsemanship time an extern told me she had groomed Presence for me but she bucked like a fiend when she saddled her. I thought to myself “What have I got myself into here” and then told the extern, “Don’t saddle her, just groom her and let me saddle her so that I can help her through this.” I knew I needed to take it slow and see what was going on inside the mind of this little horse.
My first play session with her I took it slow but at the same time I pushed her a little to see how she would react. On the ground she did great and she seemed to have gotten past the bucks.
When I went to get on her all the comments came flooding in. “She’s really sensitive”, “she bucks when you saddle her”, “has she bucked yet” all just comments but enough to make you think twice about putting your leg over her. Needless to say, I took a little extra time with my pre-ride check before getting on. She seemed good and it was now or never and I got on.
The first thing I noticed was she didn’t argue with me. If I asked her to go right she went right, no muss, no fuss. I brought the life down in my body she slowed with no hesitation. No pushing or pulling and she seemed to want to obey, what a pleasure. From that first ride I was hooked. I never had a problem from that point on or had a second thought about riding her.
Anyway Presence is now mine. She was part of the Parelli Dream Horse Program and now she is in my Dream Horse Program.
I’ll share more about her in later posts so keep tuned in…
